Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
