dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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