Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
