You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
