my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize