a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
as a side note pls kill me
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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