It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
