I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
