Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
