bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
