Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
