Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
