I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
