why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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