I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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