NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
