she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
