What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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