Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize