I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
