So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
