my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
