Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
