I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
