i permit you to call me
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
