hell yes lets make some ravioli
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
