just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
