He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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