I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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