in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
