You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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