sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
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