at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize
