He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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