Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
