I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I just want to make out with him forever
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Couch. On fire.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
