You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I am one with the molecules
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
