Your mouth is God's brothel.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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