I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize