Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
