She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
