gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
