i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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