I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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