He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
