I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
