At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
