I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
