I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize