Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
