How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
